fell off my bike on the way back from the shops on Friday morning. clipped a bin and came off sideways on a route I’ve done probably 150-200 times. there are bruises, no skin was broken, I only cried ten hours later after C got home and was nice to me.
arnica is helping.
started doing the Running Clinic’s 5k programme last week. jumped straight into the end of week 6. so until Friday my mind was entirely thinking about intervals and the next run. dead annoying to have to skip a couple of days!
C’s days at work are getting longer. I am not above saying that I find 12-14 hours home alone challenging. big love to the people who live on their own.
the long weekend was excellent, but can I remember what happened? like hell I can.
long chat with Iso this morning, partly around the ‘hero’ narrative for NHS workers. they’re not heroes, they’re skilled workers we should be grateful for and we should pay and reward properly. the moment people become heroes is the moment they can also become martyrs.
I think the only work news is that I’m staying on GOV.UK as lead designer indefinitely now and won’t be going back to international even after coronavirus stops making work a bit crazy. happy to carry on working with Stephen and the rest of the crew.
started thinking about this whole 'what does the world look like after coronavirus’, the narrative around “we can’t go back to the Before”. the trouble is, as far as I can tell anyway, the way things have been (and continue to be, let’s be real) structured is as a result of power, money, and comfort. so when I buy that coffee off someone who earns less than a proper London living wage, I’m doing that for my own comfort, and I’m still part of the exploitation. how do we reimagine power structures when it causes people discomfort to give up some of the comfort they have? I’m not entirely convinced that enough people are willing to do that. (I mean, one argument is that some people have more money than there is comfort to buy and won’t feel it anyway)
anyway, if we could reimagine the world, then thoughts around being less influenced by Europe / US - how do we get a media that properly references the whole world? I want to read about Argentina and Colombia and Nigeria and the Pacific Islands as much as I want to read about Germany and the US, please: equity of coverage hopefully leading to a bit of diversity of thought.
if the economy needs rebuilding and economic stimulus and all those things, could we rebuild it in a green way? build cities for pedestrians and bikes (so tempted to buy two of these and put them in the middle of our road early one morning to create my own car free street), tax breaks for investments in renewables, ummm other things that would help also welcome.
finally and related to the last point: just went for a walk around the grounds of Dulwich College, which have been opened up to the public for the time being. it’s huge! bigger than Dulwich Park! not to mention the attached golf course. how about we share that kind of land more often than just a once-in-a-lifetime (I hope) global pandemic, huh?
completely adore the Surly. cables are starting to stretch a bit already, but I’ll deal with that in a few weeks. only ridden it twice since the last weeknote - once with C on her way to work again, once today to go to the shops in Peckham - but I love it. can’t wait until it doesn’t feel slightly edgy to go out on a bike.
we pre-ordered a Colomba from General Store to pick up this morning, and decided to go to the butcher at the same time. going to the butcher was effing stupid, because everyone else also wanted to go there. after an hour we fell for the sunk cost fallacy and decided it wasn’t worth going home empty handed. so we stayed and got what we needed after two fucking hours, but the whole thing made me feel like I never want to go to a shop again. something about being outside for so long made me feel like I was more involved in this thing that is happening than I do when I don’t go out. felt both stupid and anxious. as per the other week: I think I prefer staying indoors.
C’s team are no longer on the wards but doing research on coronavirus at the Nightingale. it’s been a bit up in the air, but yesterday when I was at a standup early doors, she got a call and came in the room to say “right, induction’s at 11, I’m off to the Excel, bye”. bit of a whirlwind. given the circumstances, research at the Nightingale is far from the worst outcome.
work slowly ramped up as the week went on. didn’t ship anything as previously expected. did show a prototype that I already think is off to a bunch of people in other government departments. got an email from Jen that set off an awful lot of thinking, then decided off the back of some engagement-type feedback that the thinking was in the wrong direction. but hey, course correction is what we do, right? and course correction of three days of thinking and chats is a lot cheaper than course correction of building something. had a crazy useful hour of chats with Ignacia yesterday morning: I think the thing I love about being on GOV.UK is being back working with other designers every day again. sorry, other people. I like you too.
had my last therapy session yesterday morning. I ran out of things to say somewhere around when working from home started. self actualisation doesn’t feel very important at the moment: I mostly just think about food, work, and which bit of the flat might need cleaning next, and how many days it’s been since I’ve gone out and whether I should do that soon. maybe I’ll go back at some point, but for now, figuring things out about myself feels…unnecessary.
after I tweeted about the Gowlett, group chat midweek turned into “top 5 moments in the Gowlett”. special shout outs for all the quick pints that turned into not going to yoga / spin / the gym, for all the “one for the road” on the way home from elsewhere that turned into three, for all the pints on heads photos from five years ago, for all the quick pints that turned into a full evening complete with pizza, for that first time after it reopened and was only taking cash, for all the birthday parties, for our first date nearly 5 years ago. yeah, I miss the pub.
I was very, very into Barking by Ramz when it came out. have been slowly doing a rewrite, spurred by replacing “AJT” with “OGDs”, which is the shorthand for ‘other government departments’ that seems to get used everywhere. I’ve got this far: “just like OGDs, no wonder they hate on me, cos I’m making Ps [pixels] and you see this code, yeah I ship it for free”. the million dollar question is what to replace the word 'Barking’ with. yeah, I’m good, busy, how about you?
enjoyed the occasional chat this week about what’s “right” with regards to the acquisition of stuff. all kinds of stuff. food. other stuff. this article in the New York Times ends with the line “Sometimes a fleece is only a fleece. And sometimes it can be a creative rescue line, and a bet on the future.” but do I want all those warehouse workers and delivery drivers being out in the world or would I rather they stayed at home? and is it alright that I’m having what a friend called ‘the boujiest pandemic’ by mostly doing Natoora orders and occasionally visiting Jones of Brockley for bread and radicchio? in my head I’m keeping supermarkets free for people who need them, and supporting smaller suppliers. in reality, maybe I just really like expensive rhubarb and Neal’s Yard cheese.
most of the ads I get on Instagram now are for fruit and veg wholesalers who have become retailers. the algorithm knows.
accompanied C on her ride to the hospital this morning then rode back home before starting work. really not sure why we’ve allowed construction workers to still be out there, cos no one’s keeping 2m apart. roads are decently quiet!
work has been less intense this week and there were points that I felt like I was designing something in a vacuum, a little blind of policy intent, user need or GOV.UK’s position in the wider ecosystem. that’s a potential problem with working at this kind of pace and with this much going on. I was happy to end the week with a thumbs up on the work and I think we’ve now got a way forward, so I’m expecting to be shipping a second thing in 4 weeks next week. I am enjoying being close to shipping products and services again: very much my comfort zone, even on a national government website in a crisis.
I took my Surly Straggler frame and wheels to Brixton Cycles a while ago and sat with Lincoln there to order all the other bits. on Saturday last week it was ready to go! so we used our government mandated walk to go there and pick it up. it is a nice bike. I am very, very happy with it.
in a mad good mood today for some reason. probably the hour’s ride first thing. maybe the work. maybe the beer delivery from waterintobeer (thanks Tim, thanks Helen!). maybe just getting used to the indoor life. just a strange feeling of contentment. weird.